do you ever get so obsessed with a game that you start playing it in your head before you sleep
when you have a lot of homework and not enough time
HOW TO PLAY SOCCER IN GYM CLASS:
1. Get the ball
2. Pass it to someone who actually knows how to play
scary story by peter griffin
man i just wanna unzip niall’s pants and grab hold of his big, huge, thick wallet and pay for my college tuition
short people are the cutest thing ever
I hate to interrupt but I noticed you have a lamp url.
I have a lamp url myself.
I too have a lamp url.
You’re probably wondering why I have gathered you all here today…
sorry i can’t go to school my earphones aren’t working
i have money. i can drive.. i can get myself an entire thing of cupcakes right now…
no one man should have all that power
when people start getting close to your friends
when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank
they’re married now
me when someone tries to flirt with me
In Soviet Russia, kitten adopts YOU.
You can’t possibly say no to that.
"I HAVE SELECTED MY HUMAN. WE CAN NOW LEAVE THIS PLACE. HUMAN. SIGN THE REQUIRED PAPERWORK."
who looks at us
the way Kristen Bell
looks at sloths.
This one wins